Whose world is it anywayz ?

For months I hav done nothing else but wish dat I cud go bac; bac to the world I loved, the world n ppl I called ‘home‘n ‘family’. I didn’t wanna leav but at dat point didn’t hav any other choice.
I forced myself 2 move on;
To leave…

N now I desperately yearn 4 my world, 2 feel again as i used 2 feel

N slowly as I walk bac 2wards my world , I realize dat its not wat I had left . It’s different somehow; it has bcum someone else’s world .I can no longer identify it as mine. I had hoped & depended on it 2 b always der, had thot dat i cud go bac 2 it wenevr I tire of this artificial life. Had xpected 2 crawl bac into its warmth again.
How cheated I feel now, as I fail 2 identify my world n it fails 2 recognise me.

Gradually it dawned on me wat I had overluked all this while…
N dis it is:
Even when I was exiting my world, my world refused 2 depart frm me. It had clung right 2 me, all these months…
Only, I was so desperately waitin 2 go bac in time ,so that everything cud just b like it was, that I had failed to notice it. But now as I traveled bac , I found my world, only , my world had traveled forward with me . I carried it in ma heart, N wherevr I go, it will remain solidly etched in every of ma heartbeat. Now wenevr I feel the need 2 b in my world , surrounded by that familiar feeling of oneness with everyone around me , all I need 2 do is close my eyes n u will b der in front of me N wen I open my eyes u all will b der with me in the form of tears .

2 B or not 2 B

its d same old story frm ma side again ;
stl sittin at home doin nothin ...
u know , i m so comfortable doin nothin dat now its dificult 4 me 2 try n do somethin...
at tyms wen i get bored i remind myself dat ders not much dat i can complain abt..

i get free food , shop wenevr n watevr i want , ders no pressure on me 2 do nythin , i hav d whole tym 4 myself 2 do nythin i like ... :)

at tyms wen i feel dat i m wastin my life .. simply sittin
i convince myself dat i m not gonna liv ma life in a rat race ..
y shud i do somethin coz evry1 eles is doin too...?
cant i take a 6 month vacattion n do nothin !!!

at tyms i sit n wonder whether dey r all comfrtable lies dat i feed myself , in order 2 run away frm d gulit of simply sittin n rottin ??

pata nahi ...

is it coz of d huge tym dat i spent alone dat i feel lonely ?
i miss my hostel , ma life der ...
u know nowadays , i m jus existin ...
draggin myself frm one day 2 another ...
nothin 2 luk 4wrd 2 ...

but am'nt i d only only one 2 b blamed ?
its my fault dat i m sittin idle n bcumin unwilling 2 let go of d past?
isnt it ma fault wen i confess " i know i wudnt b so upset abt being away frm ma hostel if i had been doin somethin regular? say somethin likea job or studies ?"

nothin cums easy in life ..
if u want 2 b complete , den i guess i hav 2 strt takin pains..
strt explorin ...
srtr bcumin uncm4rtble n find ma way 2 cmfrt ...

all i need is a resolution !
a moment wen on d verge of my perish , i decide dat enuff is enuff n dat i m nt goin 2 let myself rot !!!

i will strt afresh ..
i'll b a new sannya
a sannya dats gonna b diffrent frm d exquisitiv sannya dat ma hostel created...
a NEW sannya , wid n whole new different personality !!!

THE REAL DELHI

I wish I cud show U my home...

The place I have been born n bought up in.

Ppl new 2 dis place wud probably call it untidy, polluted n filled with nasty rude ppl ….

I wud luv to show u the monuments

To tell u its history which in itself makes this place so unique

I wish I cud show u the grand wedding celebrations complete with the ’band-baja’ n ppl dancing away to glory ; the groom elegantly seated on the horse; the lights n color, the delightful sounds , the gaiety dat always pulls ppl into d celebrations .

I wonder wat it is in theses celebrations that forces the ppl out of their comfortable sofas towards the balcony n c d sight dat dey have been viewing since their childhood .

Y hasn’t d marriage celebrations stl not list their charms ???

I wud like to expose u to the heat n dust of this city ..

The scorching sun dat makes ppl swear everytym dey get out dat dey will probably not step out into the torture again .

I wud like u to experience the traffic jams ..

All so dat u can enjoy the rains n how d day suddenly cools down n wat a relief it is 2 step out into the surroundings made green ….

The smell of the wet earth n d freshness of the wet air on ur skin makes u want d day to go on…

The cool nite breeze soothing on ur skin after the harsh rays of the sun….

I wud want u to see the endless sea of humanity flowing thru the day

Stugglin to make ends meet ….

Struggling to make money so dat they can make a home 4 their wives …

I wish u cud feel their anxieties n their happiness

They cum away from their home n in a few yrs dey will call dis place their home

I wud luv to show u the d spirit of this place…

I wish I cud show u “dill wallon ki dilli”

A title so very apt 4 it